Let the Airing of Grievances series begin: I got a lot of problems with bad software development practices, and now you’re gonna hear about it!

Duplicate Code

Code duplication is code cancer. It spreads unmaintainable code snippets throughout the code base, making refactoring a nightmare and potentially spreading bugs. Instead, write a helper function. Add parameters to the method signature. Leverage a design pattern. I don’t care if it’s test automation or any other code – Don’t repeat yourself!

Typos

Typos are a hallmark of carelessness. We all make them from time to time, but repeated appearances devalue craftsmanship. Plus, they can be really confusing in code that’s already confusing enough! That’s why I reject code reviews for typos.

Global Non-Constant Variables

Globals are potentially okay if their values are constant. Otherwise, just no. Please no. Absolutely no for parallel or concurrent programming. The side effects! The side effects!

Using Literal Values Instead of Constants

Literal values get buried so easily under lines and lines of code. Hunting down literals when they must be changed can be a terrible pain in the neck. Just put constants in a common place.

Avoiding Dependency Management

Dependency managers like Maven, NuGet, and pip automatically download and link packages. There’s no need to download packages yourself and struggle to set your PATHs correctly. There’s also no need to copy their open source code directly into your project. I’ve seen it happen! Just use a dependable dependency manager.

Breaking Established Design Patterns

When working within a well-defined framework, it is often better to follow the established design patterns than to hack your own way of doing things into it. Hacking will be difficult and prone to breakage with framework updates. If the framework is deficient in some way, then make it better instead of hacking around it.

No Comments or Documentation

Please write something. Even “self-documenting” code can use some context. Give a one-line comment for every “paragraph” of code to convey intent. Use standard doc formats like Javadoc or docstrings that tie into doc tools. Leave a root-level README file (and write it in Markdown) for the project. Nobody will know your code the way you think they should.

Not Using Version Control

With all the risks of bugs and typos in an inherently fragile development process, you would think people would always want code protection, but I guess some just like to live on the edge. A sense of danger must give them a thrill. Or, perhaps they don’t like dwelling on things of the past. That is, until they break something and can’t figure it out, or their machine’s hard drive crashes with no backup. Give that person a Darwin Award.

No Unit Tests

If no version control wasn’t enough, let’s just never test our code and make QA deal with all the problems! Seriously, though, how can you sleep at night without unit tests? If I were the boss, I’d fire developers for not writing unit tests.

Permitting Tests to Fail

Whenever tests fail, people should be on point immediately to open bug reports, find the root cause, and fix the defect. Tests should not be allowed to fail repeatedly day after day without action. At the very least, flag failures in the test report as triaged. Complacency degrades quality.

Blue Balls

Jenkins uses blue balls because the creator is Japanese. I love Japanese culture, but my passing tests need to be green. Get the Green Balls plugin. Nobody likes blue balls.

Skipping Code Reviews

Ain’t nobody got time for that? Ain’t nobody got time when your code done BROKE cuz nobody caught the problem in review! Take the time for code reviews. Teams should also have policy for quick turnaround times.

Not Re-testing Code After Changes

People change code all the time. But people don’t always re-test code after changes are made. Why not? That’s how problems happen. I’ve seen people post updated code to a PR that wouldn’t even compile. Please, check yourself before you wreck yourself.

“It Works on My Machine”

That’s bullfeathers, and you know it! Nobody cares if it works on your machine if it doesn’t work on other machines. Do the right thing and go help the person, instead of blowing them off with this lame excuse.

Arrogance

Nobody wants to work with a condescending know-it-all. Don’t be that person.